Newspaper Archive of
Quad City Herald
Brewster, Washington
November 29, 1929     Quad City Herald
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November 29, 1929

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BREWSTER HERALD Friday, November 29, 1929 mmmm,. By ELMO SCOTT WATSON ECENT press dispatches carried the news that Dr. William P. Rothwell of Pawtucket, R. I., has caused to be cut on a hugo boulder in Oak Grove cetuetery in that city, where he will be buried, tills lnserlptlon, "This Is on me." Known as an ever-generous llost Doctor Rothwell has said "This is on me" so many thnes while, paying the check that he wants it to be hls last word. When he dies, he says, he wants no mourning among his friends, and he believes that tlle familiar words on his tombstone wlli bring smiles to them instead of sor- low. The Rhode Island doctor is not the rst to write his own epitaph and to do It in a half-Jesting mood. Per- haps the most famous of all American epitaphs was written by that first great American, Benjamin Franklin. at the age of twenty-three. It was: The Body of BENJAMIN FRANKLIN printer {like the cover of an old book, .And atrlppe-" of its lettering and gild- ing) Lie3 here food for worms: Yet the work itself silall not be lost, For it will, as he believed, appear once more In a new And more beautiful edition Corrected and amended by the Author. HIS wishes were not respected by lfls family who thought that some oth- er epitaph than this, which rellected his career as a printer, would be more appropriate. In tile case nf Robert ]L;ouls Stevenson, however, it was dif- ferent, and upon Stevenson&apos;s monu- ment in Samoa appear these beauti- ful lines which he wrote: Under the wide and starry sky, ]Dig the grave and let me lie, Glad did I live and gladly die, And I laid me down with a will. 'rhla be the verse you grave for me; Here he lies where he longed to be, ]Home la the sailor, home from sea, And the hunter home from the hill." The self-chosen epitaphs of two oth- er famous men are nearly as well known. Hllalre Belloc, the historian, chose for his: When I am gone, may only this be sald I-][111 sins were scarlet, but his books were read. On the tomb of the poet Gay in Westminster abbey appears tMs cou- plet which he wrote: Llfe Is a Jest and all things hnw it. I thought so once and now I know it. A walk through an old.Cemetery will reveal some interesting facts about tile things which people wish to have known about thent after they are gone. Especially is this true of the epitaphs written during the Colonial days In America and the early days of the republic, Many of them warn the "friend" who is passing of the certainty of death and Judgment. In some cases .the passer-by Is balled as '*passenger" instead of friend, as wit- Perhaps the strangest tombstone In the world, shown in the photograph above, stands In Hlghgate cemetery in London, England. It Is a marble pi- ano erected "To the memory of My Beloved Husband, Hm'ry Thornton, Age 35, A Genius Who Died Oct. 19th, 1918." His epitaph also includes this stanza from a poem by the qomposer, Puccini: Sweet thou art sleeping Cradled on my heart, Safe in God's keeping, While I must weep apart. hess the following from a cemetery tn Elizabeth, 'N. J., dated 1781: stop. Passenger, here lie the remains of a woman who exhibited to the world a bright constellation of the female virtues. On that memorable day. nev- er to be forgotten, when a British foe invaded this fair village and fired even the temple of the Deity, this peaceful daughter of Heaven retired to her hal- lowed apartment imploring Heaven for the pardon of her enemies. In that sacred moment she was by the bloody hand of a British ruffian dlspatclled like her divine redeemer through a path of blood to her long wished-for native skies. A good example of the combined "historical" and "admonitory" epltnph Is found on the monument of Elihu Yale, founder of Yale colege, which reads : Under this tomb lyes lnterr'd Ellhu Yale of Place Gronow, Esq., born 5th April, 1648, and dyed the 8th of July, 1721, aged 73 years. Born in America, in Europe bred, In Africa travelled, and in Asia wed, Where long he lived and thrived, in London died, Much good. some ill, he did; sO hope ali's even, And that his soul thro' mercy's gone to heaven. You that survive and read. take care For this most certain exit, to pre- pare, Where, blest in peace, the actions of the Just Smell, sweet and blossom in the silent dust. Many of the Colonial epitaphs were long-winded affairs, but the prize goes to the brass tablet, dated 1778, which appears on the walls,of St. Peter's. the oldest church in Bermuda. It 'eads: ( To the Memory of George Forbes, M. D. Whom living A singular complacency of manners Joined with many useful talents and eminent virtues. Render'd highly eatlmable Blessed with a convivial dlspt,sltion In the cheerful hour of social festivity Ha shone Irreprehensible And an agreeable companion Ever assiduous in furthering good humor and the enjoyments of soclallty friendly to mankind :1Is endeavors to mitigate the evils of life which h  bore himself with temper and philosophy were not alone confined to the healing art. Long exercised by him with much reputation 'But were likewise exerted In composing differences Restoring friendships interrupted And promoting Peace, harmony and mutual good understanding Among his fellow men Having acquitted himself with approbation in the several relations of life As he had lived, respected and beloved, So he died. Lamented and regretted for those virtues And many others which The' not enregistered on this tablet are forever engraven On the loving memory of his surviving friends. He died Jan'y 9th, 1178, aged 63 years. If the epitaph chosen by the Rhode Island doctor seems a bit flippant, he Ires plenty of precedent for this kind of Jesting. John R. Kjppax, a Chicago man, has made a collection of 'unusual epitaphs, some of whlch would seem to be more appropriate for a Joke book than a graveyard. There is the epitaph of eleven-year-old Mary Jane in a cemetery in Cape May, N. J, whlch reads : She was not smart, she was not fair, But hearts with grief for her are swellln' And empty stands her little chalr She died of eatln' watermeltn. In the town of Burlington In the same state appears this one: Here lies the body of Mary Ann Low- der, She burst while drinking a seidllts powder. Called from this world to her heavenly rest, She should have waited till it effer- vesced. Mr. KIppax Is the authority for this one, although he does not say where It may be found: Here lles the body of Deacon Speer, Whose mouth did reach from ear to ear. Stranger, tread lightly o'er the sod For If he yaps, you're gone,--by cod. Tills one comes from Connecticut: Here lies cut down like unripe fruit The wife of Deacon Amos Shuts: She died of drlnklng too much coffee Army Domlny eighteen forty. A slndlar,one, over the grave of a former slave who lived tn Savannah, Ga., tells the passer-by that: Here lies old Rastua Sommin.v Died a-eating hominy In ',59, anne domlni. In an Indiana graveyard timre is tills brief recard of a tragedy: / Here Iles I Killed by a sky llocket in my eye. In an Ohio cemetery Is an lnscrlp tion, often quoted, which reads: Under thin sod And under these trees Lleth the bod- y of Solomvn Pease. He's not in this hole But only his pod; He shelled out his soul And went up to his God. What could be more appropriate than this one, written for a Long Island (N. Y.) carpenter: No wonder he sawed short life's span For long he was a (n)alllng matt, Brief and to the point Is this from Schenectady, N. Y.: He got a fish-b0ne In .his throat And then he sang an angel note, And here Is an old epitaph, date nn. known, which In these v0odern dayg of motor cars and reckless drivers should be a warning to all of us. Espeelall; is tt recommended that "Pedestrians. paste this In your hat !": Here lles the body of William Gray, Who died maintaining his right of way He was right, dead right, As he sauntered along, But he's Just as dead, As If he'd been wrong. Wipe Out Fowl Pest The heavy hand of the government fell so emphatically npon the Inva- sion of the United States by an allen foe that Within two months of the in. vaslon 'the foe was exiermlnaled. The foe in question was one of the most dreaded of foreign diseases from the farmenf point of view--the Euro- pean fowl peal It was discovered when several farmers In Morris county, New Jar- sey, reported a strange disease which bad broken Olli annulg their clflckens. Prompt Invelilgatlnn of the first re. ports which were received In .hlne. dlst,hmed that the dreaded pest had reached this coantry. Wltllln two weeks all Infested fowls aml numbers of others which Inld heen exposed were destroyed, and pfter a monlh wlthmlt' further reports of the dis. ease, the federal ofltHals were con- vinced the! the ovlbreak had been suppressed willie In the stage of outl)reakhlg. Man's Vanity There are two oct.'uslons when we men think we look ,spleadld--when we rig up in evening clolbes and wb'ea we have on the regalia of the Grand In. slde Do,rslummer.--St. Louis Globe DelnocraL Wisdom Who Is wise? He that learns from every one. Who is powerful? He that goverus his passions. Who Is rich? He that is content. Who Is that? Nobody. Franklin. m.,. .--- _ What Home Ownership Means to Average Man Look into tile family life of the home owner--there you find right thln|dng, thrift and pride. Father, mother and the children weeding the lawn, planting flowers and trees. Would they take that same interest working in a yard where contentment is measured by dollars and cents, paid to the landlord each month? Spare time is spent making im )rovements, placing a touch here and there to enhance the beauty and in- crease the value of the home place. Drive over the city and you can easily dlstlngulsh the home that is owned by the family within from the house which is rented. The home owner gives his children a better chance. Good citizens grow out of well-established homes. They are bet- ter known and they command respect in their community. If for any reason one has outgrown one's present place, relnember there is some one ready to take It over--- some one who will be proud to call it homo. He should by all means buy another. One can never be satisfied unless one does. After once ownlng your own home it Is evident that life seems ahnless and shallow, paying for the privilege of living in some one's property other than your own. Tile American home means so much today. It is the very corner stone of prOgress and safety. Its morale and dignity must be upheld. The home owner commands respect.--Indlanap- ells News. Roof Important Unit in Decorative Scheme The modem note in home decors tion, according to leading authorities, is complete harmony of color, outside as well as inside the lmllding. According to this idea, while the roof of a house must give protection against the elements and must be last- ing, yet as a prominent archltectural feature of tile house, the roof should also add to the beauty of the structure. In line with this idea, commercial roofing materials are being manufac. tured in the greatest selection of col. ors. With these new colors it is pos. sible to make the roof one of the most effective units in the deeoratlve scheme. These beautiful olors can be com- bined In an ahnost endless variety of tasteful combinations to harmonize with every architectural style and col. or scheme. By consulting a roofing color chart, information is obtained In a second a to what color roof is IU harmony wlth a red brick house, n white Colonhd' residence, or a gray, l)rown or Cl'eflnl bulhllng. The chart also takes Into consideration the, color of the trhu so tlmt building, roof and trim mqy form a harmonious whole. Protection From Fire Tile modern home Imilder forsees and cancels a possible "4-11" fire alarm wlmn he plans his house. He knows, for example, t!mi a don- siderable proportion of huse fires originate hi basements--around beat- ing plgnts or In stores of fuel, ash, trash or other Inllammable nmterhll. So he plans to prevent such figures climhing upward and through his house. Fire may also enter through the roof whlcil is exposed to llying em- bers. Fire-Safe shingles or tile elim- Inate the hazard and add materially to the beauty of the home. Real fire safety also implies fire resistive construction In exterior walls. Fire stops in walls, nahum- able stairways, proper design of fire- places and chimneys--these are a few of the details the modern builder In- cludes In his far-slgUted "4-11" alarm preventive. Be Liberal With Paint Paint is insurance against losses re- suiting from weathering and deay. Paint protects a house and keeps It In good condition. Weathering and decay cause losses, according to one author. .ity, of over a billion and a half dol- lars a year. While most of us are willing to pay for fire insurance be- cause o$ the sense of security it brings, few of us realize that weather insurance Is really more necessary be- cause while fire rarely threatens, weathering and decay are constantly t work to lower houses into dust. It has been estimated that If a house is painted every five years, its value in- creases about 5 per cent at each paint. Longer Covenants Urged In many suburban sections there has come a change tu the duration of restrictions placed on property. It was formerly thought that 20 years was long enough, but developers are now of the belief that 83 years is better. The reasoning behind the new figure is that a man who buys a house at the beginning of his business career, and often at about tile time he takes on tile responsibilities of mar. r!age, will be approaehlng the close of active participation In business at the end of 38 years. Plant Protection The uprooting of ferns and other plants growing in roads, lanes, banks or commons is a punishable offend,' in Berkshire, Eng. ,@ People are often too patient with pain. Suffering when them is no need to stif- fer. Shopping with a head that throbs, Working though they ache all over, And Dayer Aspirin would bring im- mediate relld[ The best time to ttke Bayer Aspirin Is the moment you first feel the pain. Why postpone relief urttil the pain hen reached its height? Why hesitate to take anything so harmless? Read the proven directions for check* tng colds, easing a sore throat; relie, g headaches and the paros of neuralgia, neuritis, rheumatism, etc. You caa always count on it8 quick comfort. But if pain is of frequent xecurrenca see a doctor as to its cause. BAYEB ASPIRI00 Apirin  the trade mark" of Bayer Manufacture of Monoaceticaceiter ot Ilieyll,',,d It may be the little stomadi; if may be the bowels are sluggish. No matter what coats a child's tongue, its a safe and sensible pi'ecaution to give a few drops of Castoria. This gentle regulation of the little system soon sets things to rights. A pure vegetable Pnreparation that can't harm a wee hat, but brings quick comfort ----evcn when it is colic, diarrhea, or similar disturbancc. And don't forsake Cagtoria as te child grows older. If yo want to raise boys and girls with strong systems that will ward off c6nstipation, stick to good old Castoria; and give nothing stronger when there's any irregu- larry except on the advice of a doctor. Castoria is sold in every drugstore, and the genuine always bears Chas. H. Fletcher's signs= ture on the-wrapper. F you don't think your whole Hie can be changed by chance, read this. It is the story of a young man who was pretty well down and but, but he figured he might win a prize ff he took some advice. "As far back as I can. remember I had been a weakling," says Mr. Calvin L. Floyd of Orlando, Florida. f'A headache, it seemed, was. to be my life companion. I was always dizzy in the mornings. Nothing I : :V: :::::.::> .::;:: : ;:i:':{; : :.::::::::'::::.<::::: : .'::4" ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: ,:::::, :::;<:: :::::::::::::::::::::::::" :. <.  :::! ::. {iiiiiii!iiiii!i!ill ;::':::4::: ':":: ;: :::';" .: .::;::.. ,&:::.:.:.: .i!i:. :'}.::::. :i$i:" ' "':': ':: ate seemed good fo me. Then I attended a health lecture in a sana- torium and the physidan talked on "faulty elimination.: That was cer- tainly my trouble. One of the patients asked him about Nujol. He repine mended it highly. E derided to tr one bottle to sce ff there was any- thing in what he said about natural hbricatinn for the human body. "Long before I had flalshed the rst bottle my 'companin-hdache', wu gone. No more tired out feeling. I get a real kick out of life now. By the way, I almost forgot to tell you I found a new life companion, tool' Perfectly simple, Wasn't it? Mr. Floyd just learned the normal nat- ural way to get rid of bodily poisons (we all have them) and nature did the rest. Why shouldn't u be well Nujol is not a medidne. It con- tains no drugs. It iS effective, so you will be "regular as dock-w0rk." You ca buy it at all good drug stores in sealed packages for les than the price of a couple of good dgars. Begin today. Millions have found that Nu|ol makes all the difference in the world. Nujol will make rou feel fine and you can prove it. "Does your mirror re flea roug,izly .i? / '  l . ' C.tlcur ' ANOINT the affected pe wieh Cudcura Ointment. //./, Wuh off |- a few minutes wid Cudcum Soap "/rod ho ]// water and continue bathing. Pimples, t'hes sad ill forms/ f skin truble qulcklT yield t his ttment" '' "/J7 tl 1)